When to Wear a Bowtie: My go to guide

I’ve always believed that what we wear should be a reflection of who we are—our values, our personality, and our sense of occasion. In the 21st century, fashion has become wonderfully eclectic, and the "rules" are softer than ever. That’s something to celebrate. But if you're anything like me, you still enjoy the quiet confidence that comes from wearing something well-chosen, purposeful, and just a little bit different.

For those drawn to bowties—or simply curious about when and where to wear one—I've pulled together a few personal insights. These aren’t hard rules, but suggestions drawn from years of working with customers, stylists, and friends who’ve worn our ties to everything from weddings to operating theatres.

Elegant Engagements: Black Tie Affairs and Red Carpet Moments

There’s no better place to start than the formal evening event. Think tuxedos, gala dinners, award ceremonies—the kind of night where glamour and polish are expected. For these, a bowtie isn’t just appropriate—it’s essential.

The classic choice is a black silk self-tie, or sometimes a white cotton Marcella for a white-tie event. While pre-tied versions exist, most seasoned dressers will tell you that a hand-tied bow gives the evening an unmistakable air of elegance. And yes, I know several who swap out a pre-tied version for a self-tie after dinner, just to look the part!

Still, there’s room to be distinctive. A batwing or butterfly shape, a matte finish, or a subtle metallic detail can elevate your formalwear and make a quiet but memorable statement. I’ve always admired those who lean into elegance without losing their individuality.

Matrimonial Merriment: BowTies at Weddings

Weddings are among my favourite occasions for bowties. Whether you're the groom, part of the wedding party, or simply a guest, a bowtie brings a festive, considered touch to the day.

Recently, I’ve seen grooms coordinating their bowties with the wedding palette—think sage greens, soft blues, or classic paisleys. Some mix neckties and bowties within the party for variety, while others embrace full coordination. Guests often match their bowtie to their partner’s outfit or pick out an accent colour in their shoes or pocket square.

Weddings invite personality. I always tell customers: if ever there was a moment to wear a bowtie, it’s a day of joy and celebration.

On the High Seas: Cruise Dinners & Formal Nights

Cruise ships—especially the more traditional lines—still celebrate formal nights with great enthusiasm. I’ve spoken with several clients who bring a suitcase full of bowties just for these evenings! There’s a bit of good-natured competition onboard, with guests donning their finest and most original accessories.

This is the time to be playful: bold prints, luxurious fabrics, and conversation-starting styles are all welcome. A coordinated look with your travel companion can be especially charming.

A BowTie in the Workplace

Finally, I’d be remiss not to mention the practical elegance of bowties in professional life. Unlike traditional ties, bowties don’t dangle or get in the way. That’s one reason I’ve supplied bow ties to countless doctors, scientists, and teachers.

One paediatric doctor once told me he wears bright bowties to help put his young patients at ease. Another, a lawyer in the U.S., wears one in court as a personal signature. And I’ve lost count of the number of teachers who’ve said their students love the detail and thought a bowtie represents.

Bowties in the workplace show care, confidence, and creativity. Whether it’s tweed in the classroom or silk in the courtroom, they quietly say, “I’ve thought about this.”

Whether you're dressing for a black-tie event, planning your wedding look, boarding a cruise, or simply heading into work, there’s always a right time for a bowtie. And if you ever need help finding the perfect one, I’m always here.

With love,

Emma

Founder, Arsenic and Old Lace

About Arsenic and Old Lace

At Arsenic and Old Lace, we believe a bowtie is more than just an accessory—it’s an attitude. Since founding the shop, I’ve worked to create a space where craftsmanship, personality, and purpose come together in every piece we offer.

We specialise in handmade bowties, both pre-tied and self-tie, crafted in limited runs using thoughtfully sourced fabrics. Each design is chosen not only for its beauty but for how it fits into real lives—whether you’re a doctor seeking a hygienic touch of style, a groom planning your big day, or simply someone who appreciates the quiet power of a well-made detail.

Everything we do is about intention. Slow fashion. Quality over quantity. And helping you feel just a little more like yourself, whether you're on the dance floor, in the boardroom, or simply out for dinner.