Should You Wear a Bow Tie or a Neck Tie? Here's My Expert Guide

As someone who’s spent years styling everything from sharp tuxedos to last-minute best man outfits at Arsenic and Old Lace, I can tell you:The bow tie vs. neck tie debate is real.

And if you’ve ever stood in front of a mirror, tie in one hand and growing panic in the other, wondering which to choose—you’re not alone. I’ve been there, my customers have been there, and yes, even James Bond probably second-guessed himself once.

This guide is here to help. I’ll walk you through the pros and cons of each option—based on years of styling experience (and one or two formalwear mishaps of my own)—so you can make the right choice with confidence and maybe even a smile.

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Why You Can Trust Me

I’ve helped hundreds of customers dress for weddings, awards nights, date nights, job interviews—you name it. I know what works, what doesn’t, and what looks great in photos even when you’re three glasses of champagne in.

This isn’t just theory. This is advice born from real-world experience, awkward fitting room moments, and lots of lint rollers.

Bow Ties: Dashing, Distinct, and a Bit Rebellious

Bow ties are a personal favourite of mine. Not because I think everyone should wear one (though wouldn’t the world be more fun?), but because they say something.

Papplewick Cornflower Blue Blossom Pre-Tied Bow Tie

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When a Bow Tie Works Best:

• Black-tie or white-tie events

• Weddings (bonus points if you’re giving a speech)

• Creative or artsy events where “boring” is a fashion crime

• Retro or vintage-themed parties—or if you just feel like channelling your inner Gatsby

  
  

Why I Recommend a Bow Tie:

• It’s an instant conversation starter. People notice. People comment. People respect the effort.

• It stays out of your soup, your wine, and your dance partner’s face.

• There are lots of styles—from bold and modern to understated and elegant. It's basically personality in fabric form.

  
  

But Beware:

• It’s less versatile than a neck tie. Wearing one to the office might raise eyebrows—unless your job involves jazz hands.

• Tying one takes practice. Yes, YouTube helps, but yes, you’ll still probably swear the first five times.

• Not everyone "gets" them. That’s okay. Let them wear their boring neck ties.

Oxton Olive Green Floral Neck Tie

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Neck Ties: Classic, Polished, and Always Reliable

Think of the neck tie as the Swiss Army knife of men’s accessories. It works just about anywhere, and there’s one for every occasion, every outfit, and every questionable shirt you bought on sale.

When a Neck Tie Is the Smart Choice:

• Business meetings, interviews, or any day you want to look like you’ve got it together—even if your socks don’t match

• Weddings, especially where “formal” is open to interpretation

• Dinner dates, presentations, or anywhere you want to say: “I tried, but not too hard.”

  
  

Why I Often Recommend a Neck Tie:

• The variety is endless. Solids, stripes, paisley, novelty prints involving flying pigs—you name it.

• It pairs easily with any suit or blazer. No mental gymnastics required.

• In a work setting, it immediately signals professionalism (the good kind, not the scary HR kind).

A Few Cautions:

• They’re everywhere. If you’re hoping to stand out, a plain tie might not cut it.

• They’re stain magnets. Spaghetti bolognese? Proceed with extreme caution.

• On a hot day, a snug neck tie can feel like a polite noose. Loosen accordingly.

My Foolproof Guide: Bow Tie or Neck Tie?

Here’s the little decision-making grid I often use with customers (and occasionally myself):

Question	Bow Tie	Neck Tie
Is it black-tie or white-tie?	Yes	Nope
Want to stand out and make a statement?	Yes	Maybe
Going to the office or an interview?	Yes – in the right setting	Absolutely
Need something easy and versatile?	Not really	Definitely
Want to impress without YouTube tutorials?	Maybe not	Tie away

My rule of thumb?If you want to play it safe but stylish—go with a neck tie.If you want to turn heads and maybe get a few compliments from stylish aunts—bow tie all the way.

What to Wear Where: Bow Tie vs. Neck Tie by Event

Still not sure which tie belongs where? Here's a quick cheat sheet based on real-life occasions. Whether you're headed to prom or paying respects at a memorial, this guide will help you make the right call—without phoning a fashion friend.

Event	Bow Tie	Neck Tie	Style Tip
Prom	Yes – adds flair and confidence	Yes – classic and dependable	Choose based on your suit: tux = bow tie, suit = either
Wedding (Guest)	Yes – great for formal or themed weddings	Yes – especially for semi-formal events	Match the dress code; bold tie = fun, neutral = safe
Wedding (Groom/Party)	Yes – especially with tuxedos	Yes – if going for a more relaxed look	Coordinated ties make for great group photos
Funeral or Memorial	No – typically too playful	Yes – always appropriate	Stick to solid, muted tones (black, grey, navy)
Job Interview	Yes – if you're confident and the culture fits	Yes – professional and safe	A crisp bow tie can impress in creative or academic settings
Business Meeting	Yes – if it suits the environment	Yes – always appropriate	Know your audience: traditional industries prefer neck ties
A Day at the Races	Yes – especially in summer or themed enclosures	Yes – safe and stylish choice	Go bold or go home (within reason). Pastels, prints, even linen!
Theatre or Opera Visit	Yes – especially for opening night	Yes – depends on the dress code	Aim for “sophisticated, not over-the-top”
Gala or Charity Ball	Yes – almost expected	Maybe – but choose something elegant	This is bow tie country—own it!
Dinner Date	Maybe – if you’re feeling daring	Yes – reliable and flattering	Your tie should impress, not intimidate
Graduation Ceremony	Yes – for a formal, standout look	Yes – timeless and polished	Match school colors subtly, or go for sleek neutrals
Christmas Party	Yes – festive and fun	Yes – classic and flexible	Bow tie with velvet jacket = instant charm
Office Christmas Do	Maybe – if your boss has a sense of humour	Yes – especially with a blazer	Go seasonal but tasteful. No novelty reindeer unless you're the DJ

If You Skimmed the Whole Thing – Here's the Cheat Sheet

(We see you, skimmers. No judgment.)

• Bow Tie → Great for formal events, standing out, and showing some personality. Ideal if you want to look sharp and slightly cooler than everyone else.

• Neck Tie → Your go-to for versatility, professionalism, and not overthinking things. Solid, classic, and always appropriate.

  
  

Still stuck? Ask yourself: “Would James Bond wear this to my event?”If yes: Proceed with confidence.If no: Maybe rethink the novelty flamingo print.

Sometimes its best to mix and match

Final Thoughts (from One Who’s Seen It All)

Choosing between a bow tie and a neck tie isn’t just about fabric—it’s about how you want to feel. Sharp? Confident? Memorable? Go bow tie.Elegant? Professional? Effortlessly put-together? Neck tie’s your friend.

And remember: Whatever you wear, wear it with confidence. A well-tied neck tie looks smart. A slightly wonky bow tie looks charming. A man who’s clearly uncomfortable in his outfit? That’s the only fashion faux pas you need to avoid.

Need Help Choosing? That’s What I’m Here For

At Arsenic and Old Lace, we carry a curated collection of stylish, high-quality bow ties and neck ties for every kind of event and every kind of man. If you’re still unsure what to wear, drop me a message—I’ll gladly help you pick the right one (and talk you out of anything satin leopard print… unless you can truly pull it off).

Take a look at our full collection: www.arsenicandoldlace.co.uk

Until then, stay stylish, stay true to yourself,

Emma

Arsenic and Old Lace